On July 6, 2013, Asiana Airlines Flight 214 from South Korea crashed short of the runway at San Francisco Airport.  The plane struck the ground with the tail hitting a seawall.  Three flight attendants were ejected.  One of the remaining flight attendants, Lee Yoon-Hye, helped hundreds of passengers get safely out of the plane and onto the runway.

When an emergency slide deployed improperly, Lee handed a knife to the co-pilot who punctured the slide.  When she saw flames erupt, she tossed a fire extinguisher to a colleague.  It was later discovered that she did all of this with a broken tailbone.

You may be thinking, “Ok, a heroic story, but how does that relate to me?”  Here is the point: Lee was able to perform at this level in a crisis, in part, because their flight training is intense.  They practice and practice evacuating a plane until they are able to empty a jumbo jet filled with passengers in 90 seconds.  Then when a real crisis happens, as it did on that flight, they just follow their training.

Wouldn’t it be nice if we were able to similarly respond to crises in our significant relationships with that kind of deftness?  Instead, many couples hit a stressful situation and implode or have some kind of meltdown.  Rather than work as a team, as Lee and her colleagues did, it’s easy for us to turn on each other.

What if we practiced?  What if when times are good we had honest conversations about crises that we are likely to face?  What if we spent time reading books with our partner about ways to improve our relationship?  What if we went to a weekend marriage retreat with our spouse?  What if (intimacy at its best) we prayed with our spouse?

It would be wonderful to be trained to respond to a marital or family crisis successfully in 90 seconds.  I encourage you to explore with your significant other this week how the two of you can better prepare for life’s unexpected curve balls.  I would love to hear what you come up with.

On July 6, 2013, Asiana Airlines Flight 214 from South Korea crashed short of the runway at San Francisco Airport.  The plane struck the ground with the tail hitting a seawall.  Three flight attendants were ejected.  One of the remaining flight attendants, Lee Yoon-Hye, helped hundreds of passengers get safely out of the plane and onto the runway.

When an emergency slide deployed improperly, Lee handed a knife to the co-pilot who punctured the slide.  When she saw flames erupt, she tossed a fire extinguisher to a colleague.  It was later discovered that she did all of this with a broken tailbone.

You may be thinking, “Ok, a heroic story, but how does that relate to me?”  Here is the point: Lee was able to perform at this level in a crisis, in part, because their flight training is intense.  They practice and practice evacuating a plane until they are able to empty a jumbo jet filled with passengers in 90 seconds.  Then when a real crisis happens, as it did on that flight, they just follow their training.

Wouldn’t it be nice if we were able to similarly respond to crises in our significant relationships with that kind of deftness?  Instead, many couples hit a stressful situation and implode or have some kind of meltdown.  Rather than work as a team, as Lee and her colleagues did, it’s easy for us to turn on each other.

What if we practiced?  What if when times are good we had honest conversations about crises that we are likely to face?  What if we spent time reading books with our partner about ways to improve our relationship?  What if we went to a weekend marriage retreat with our spouse?  What if (intimacy at its best) we prayed with our spouse?

It would be wonderful to be trained to respond to a marital or family crisis successfully in 90 seconds.  I encourage you to explore with your significant other this week how the two of you can better prepare for life’s unexpected curve balls.  I would love to hear what you come up with.