I still remember my freshman year in college in Dallas. I had a professor named Ronnie Hannah. It is not uncommon for freshman to need a little time to adjust to the college pace, and maybe even get a bit behind on their work. I was no exception. Several of us would find ourselves going to Mr. Hannah, with a tale of woe as to why we would be turning in an assignment late. I recall beginning to say to him, “I’m not going to have my assignment on time, but I have a good excuse” – and as I was about to launch into my well-rehearsed excuse, he would quickly respond with, “An excuse is the skin of a reason stuffed with a lie.” What? Needless to say, he didn’t accept excuses.
While your spouse probably doesn’t quote Ronnie Hannah, I am guessing that he or she gets tired of over-used excuses. We may get busted for not following through on an agreed upon task. So, what do we do? Do we own our mistake? Or do we make an excuse – thinking that will keep us out of trouble? I have often found that excuses try the other person’s patience more than they get them off the hook.
Owning our mistakes usually goes a lot further in healing a fracture than making an excuse. But this requires sincere humility. And if we are honest, we don’t like being in what feels like a “lessor” position. However, I would submit that owning our “stuff” actually keeps us on an even playing field with our mate.
So, today I would encourage you to embrace your short-comings rather than using “the skin of a reason, stuffed with a lie.”