It has been another long day – dealing with work and kid demands, and you are tired. Fortunately, your husband said that tonight nobody is going to cook – you’re going out for dinner. As you are about ready to head out, he asks, “Where would you like to go to dinner?” It is a…
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OK – perhaps you can’t really laugh your way to sanity, though it would be nice if you could. But, can humor help you deal with relationship struggles more effectively? To which I would say “Yes.” I recently sat with a couple who had just moved her 89-year-old mother into their home from another city.…
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Conflict seems unavoidable. And I guess, at some level, it is. Now I recognize this can look very different from one relationship to another. For some, there is conflict, often heated, nearly every day. For others, conflict may be mild and infrequent. But it still exists. I want to look at a couple of items…
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Sometimes it may seem that other couples are happier than you. They laugh more and they just seem to enjoy each other more than you and your spouse. Are they just better matched or are they doing something differently? While I can’t speak to how naturally compatible they may be, I do find that most…
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Remember those early days of dating. While I know that for some of you that may seem like a lifetime ago. But try to think back . . . recall those early connections. When I was in Jr. High School (it wasn’t called middle school back then), a guy gave a girl a St. Christopher…
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I’m sure this will come as no surprise to you, but people are stressed during the holidays. You are probably thinking, “Duh!” It is always interesting to see what things are the most triggering for my clients. For one couple it was who was going to be in charge of the menu and letting other…
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So, you had a fight with your spouse yesterday. It was a silly fight, in many respects. You found yourself actually arguing over how to load the dishwasher. While not uncommon, you somehow managed to use words that, not only made their way seem inferior, you attacked their character and implied that, as a person,…
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As most couples approach marriage, they usually have dreams of partnering with their future mate in ways that allow them to be companions and teammates. They hope to be on the same page. However, as time goes by, and they discover glaring differences, they often are prone to petty criticisms. For example, I recently had…
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More and more I find myself listening to clients describe fights they have with their mate that drag on forever – or at least for a really long time. But do they need to? One would think that couples would want fights to end quickly so that they could move on to enjoying each other.…
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For so many people the evenings seem to be a time to collapse. You give your best energies at work, then you transport kids to various practices, try to get some dinner in everybody, and then – you get to the couch read to veg out. You don’t want to be bothered with bills, or…
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