As I recently sat listening to a couple, I was aware of just how quickly they are headed towards divorce. This is in part because they want all of their problems and conflicts solved immediately – if not sooner. And because of their impatience, they were barreling towards the divorce cliff. Yet – this doesn’t…
DetailsDo you remember when you were young and your mother said something like, “Don’t eat any cookies before dinner or you will ruin your appetite.” So what did you do? For me, the call of the cookies was oftentimes too strong and I would succumb. But then you know what would happen. I wasn’t hungry…
DetailsA recently read quote – “If you want to kill a relationship outright, have an affair. But if you want to bludgeon it to death slowly, use criticism.” Ongoing criticism causes people to feel unloved, attacked, disrespected, and many other feelings that you could add to the list. If I were to ask an audience,…
DetailsWithout a doubt 2020 was one for the books. If you were anything like our family and so many others, normal didn’t seem to exist. Traditional holiday gatherings didn’t happen, at least not quite the same; yearly trips that you look forward to were cancelled; and friends you regularly get together with you went for…
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I see many couples in my office who are in the middle of the tornado. By that I mean, they have school age children at home; they both work full-time; then they have to take one kid to gymnastics and the other one to soccer practice. The weekend comes and there are soccer games to…
DetailsHow do you connect with touch? For too many, this question stirs up thoughts of – “Ok, here is where he is going to talk about why we need to have more sex.” “Well, we just can’t right now. I mean the kids are on the go constantly and any free time seems to be…
DetailsConflict, fights, arguments, disagreements – these are all words that make us want to go hide. As I sit with couples on a daily basis, I listen to the creative ways that each party escapes in order to avoid all of those above words. While there may be something that is bothering them, they will…
DetailsIt has been a long week and you are looking forward to Friday night. Between work, the kids, and your parents – you are exhausted. You are in dire need of rejuvenation; of an energy boost. So, you approach your spouse to discuss what the two of you might want to do with, what has…
DetailsI know couples who seem to fight all the time. Some are always on the verge of walking out, while others would label their marriage as very happy. What is the difference? It may be in how we approach conflict. Unless we are exactly like the person we are in a relationship with (in which…
DetailsA story is told of a discussion at a linguistic conference in London, England. This was supposedly attended by some of the best linguists in the world. They were competing to find the best definitions and explain the differences between the words “complete” and “finished.” Samsundar Balgobin was named the winner when he was posed…
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