Emotions are feelings that we all experience. Some emotions we think of as positive – such as love, hope, optimism, and joy. Others we often perceive as negative – hate, anger, pessimism, and resentment. However, I would submit that there really aren’t positive and negative emotions. Feelings just are. We may be happy or sad…
DetailsWhen reading that question you may think, “I don’t have any unspoken rules,” and perhaps you don’t – now. But my suspicion is that you probably have a few, and when you were first married you had a ton of them. You see “unspoken rules” are those ways that we have of doing things that…
DetailsToday is a sad day. Yesterday, (as I write this it is July 31st) I had to put one of my beloved dogs to sleep. He was 12 years old and had been battling serious health issues for about 4 months. He was a fighter but yesterday it was clear that he was tired of…
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It was not that long ago that a read an intriguing article, Which Generation Has The Best Marriages? by Haydin Shaw. For my purposes here I simply want to look at the strengths different generations have to offer one another when it comes to marriage. The Traditionalists (Born before 1946) This group of couples value…
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Have you ever heard someone make the statement, “He/She just brings out the worst in me?” Usually, the statement is made by the person who has just reacted angrily, said something inappropriate, or done something foolish. But rather than own their misbehavior, they attempt to place the blame on the other person by making it…
Details“Now what kind of a question is that,” you might think. “I buy groceries and gas; car insurance and clothes; purses and TVs. I spend money on vacations, Starbucks, cars, shoes, and a plethora of things.” Yes, we all spend money on these kinds of items. So, maybe I should refine the question some –…
DetailsI recently received the following humorous story from a friend. A husband went to police station to report his missing wife: Husband : I’ve lost my wife, she went shopping yesterday & has still not come home…. Sergeant : What is her height ? Husband : Oh, 5 something . . . Sergeant : Build?…
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“I’m really frustrated because I arrived home, expecting dinner, only to discover that nothing had even been done, no effort had even been made to start dinner!” Why did this person expect dinner to be ready? It might be because every other night dinner has been prepared. Or it could be that the person grew…
DetailsA New York University researcher reported last year that in a study which allowed people to bend the rules (cheat), individuals were more likely to do so in order to avoid loss rather than to make a gain. I experience this application to marriage on a daily basis. As I encounter couples in my counseling…
Details“She is such a pig. I mean, she leaves messes everywhere.” He continues, “I feel like I work all day and then come home and have to do everything.” “I can’t believe you are saying that,” she replied. “Yesterday when I got home I fixed you dinner and cleaned up everything. So, I don’t know…
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