“The dirty dishes in the sink needed to be done?” “The dog needs a bath.” “The trash is piled up and overflowing.” “We haven’t had sex in over a month.” I hear these kinds of comments frequently and I can’t help but wonder – whose responsibility is it to initiate action?
So, often couples will both see the problem or what needs to happen, but then will wait on the other person to do something about it. This afternoon, I sat with a couple who are trying to get pregnant. Of course, to get pregnant, (at least the last time I checked), they needed to have sex. They both clearly knew that, but for some reason, or actually for a variety of reasons, they are waiting on each other to initiate.
I remember as a kid, how easy it was to push the overly full trash in the kitchen trash can down just a little bit further so that I wouldn’t have to take out the trash. I wanted one of my sisters to have to do it. Of course, we were ridiculous children back then. Yet, as grown adults – we can still act like little children. And it is even more ridiculous.
We can certainly choose to initiate all that I have listed above if we want to. But here are some other areas where initiating can have positive results.
- Household tasks – like bringing the garbage cans in from the street or cleaning up a leftover spill on the kitchen counter.
- Planning a date night. I see lots of couples agree on a date night and even put it on the calendar. Then they both wait for the other to initiate. Why don’t you take the lead?
- Self-Improvement. We all know we have personal areas to work on in our life. But why does it seem to frequently require our spouse to jump all over us before we do anything? We can so easily take the initiative.
These are just a few examples. I want to encourage you to take the initiative today and see what happens.