As you read this title, you may be thinking one of two things – “Of course I support my spouse,” or “I used to support him or her, but I’ve gotten out of the habit.” Regardless of where you land, supporting each other is essential for a healthy marriage. Today I want to take a…
As a Marriage and Family Therapist, I talk with couples a lot about communication. We all know how to open our mouths and speak words, but that is no guarantee that we actually know how to communicate. Good communication requires a few skills combined with a lot of intentionality. Today I want to talk about…
Now you may be thinking, “My marriage is going great! So, why do I need to spring clean it?” We often think that when the marriage is doing well that we are best off to leave things alone. I mean, we certainly don’t want to mess up anything. But it is when we are firing…
Now you may have never heard the word Selah before. But it is a Hebrew word that is found in the Bible, almost exclusively in the Psalms. It is thought to be a kind of musical direction, as the Psalms were actually songs. But what does the word mean? Based upon inferences from the context…
This is a question that seems to rarely get asked by couples but it can be a valuable one. You see, we date and get married and we know what we have in common. For example, you may know that your new spouse is a Type A personality, while you are not quite as driven.…
I see far too many clients who are holding out for . . . any number of things that prevent them from engaging constructively in their marriage. For example, there may be an issue that is keeping you at odds with your spouse. You know that it needs to be brought up and discussed, but…
Last time we looked at the first of three critical appointments that we all must address. The first one was an appointment that we have with ourselves. This involves examining ourselves and our lives on a daily basis to see if we are who we say we are. We look at why we get up…
It has been another long day – dealing with work and kid demands, and you are tired. Fortunately, your husband said that tonight nobody is going to cook – you’re going out for dinner. As you are about ready to head out, he asks, “Where would you like to go to dinner?” It is a…
I recently finished reading a book by bestselling author, Matthew Kelly. Towards the latter part of the book he discussed three appointments that we all have. They aren’t appointments with a prospective boss, or your future wife’s parents, or even someone in law enforcement. They are not complicated but rather are simple, clear, and direct.…
OK – perhaps you can’t really laugh your way to sanity, though it would be nice if you could. But, can humor help you deal with relationship struggles more effectively? To which I would say “Yes.” I recently sat with a couple who had just moved her 89-year-old mother into their home from another city.…