Are You All In?

I just finished a session with a couple today that was frustrating for them and frustrating for me as well. Why? Because they are not all in. It won’t surprise you to know that I see couples who are having “issues.” All of them. This couple today was no exception. They have been separated for…

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Are You Addicted to Your Spouse?

Now at first glance, that question may be confusing. Someone once described addiction as “any coping mechanism or substance used to escape feelings.” This can refer to a variety of issues: alcohol, drugs, gambling, and sex, just to name a few. And one of the ways that a sexual addiction can show up is in…

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Are You Absently Present?

In 2016 Psychology Today called attention to the fact that smartphones fragment human consciousness. They contend that the habitual use of smartphones lowers our ability to be empathetic as well as diminishes the “quality of conversation.” This is our third in a series addressing technology and our relationships. In the first post we looked at…

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Are You a Participant or a Spectator?

My wife and I have been recently watching the television series, “The Crown.” It has been fascinating to learn so much about the modern history of England and the United Kingdom. In a recent episode we learned a little about Princess Alice who was the mother of Prince Philip. As she was lying in bed,…

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Are You a Gerbil?

“Am I a gerbil?” “What kind of question is that?” you may be thinking. Of course you’re not a gerbil. But I wonder if you might be exhibiting gerbil like qualities. Comedian Jeff Allen, who I wrote about recently, was talking with his wife about their gerbil. He said, “Watch it. It gathers up sticks…

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Are You a Donkey?

Now I can imagine that as you read the title you may be thinking, “Well, my spouse has told me that I am stubborn like a donkey before.”  But that is not what I am talking about today. A story is told of a farmer’s donkey that fell down into a well.  The animal cried…

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